Any Demi Lovato Fans here?
Her recent song called "Sober" has me in tears.
I 've had a drinking situation. I feel that this year and a half I had stopped my bad habits not only because I don't keep alcohol in my place (which was an issue at the last place I stayed with someone I knew) It took me awhile to figure out that the key is to drink in moderation and not because it made it easier for me to live day-by-day after the passing of my mother. The days following my mom's passing was definitely a world of problems with my family dynamic and I had to make huge decisions about where I wanted to be and who I wanted to be with since I didn't have money saved to rent at that time. Also, I was attending college while this was all going on. Just to be clear, I never drank to point of throwing up and I've never blacked out to the point of not knowing what previously happened.
I'll always feel guilty for turning to alcohol for a sense of comfort and warmth it gave after it would smoothly go down. That was as close I could get to having a warm hug from something that would always be there. My mother had the best warm hugs that somehow made me feel closer to my father who passed when I was 1 yr. old. The sensation of comfort and warmth would make it simple to sleep.
I don't know why I wrote this post as brutally honest as I did but, I feel like it has healed a part of me that was heavy-weighted and bottled-up. As of now, I choose not to have drinks in my home so I don't relapse but I still will enjoy one drink socially and if I'm gifted with a bottle from a loved one.